War post 2: In the trenches

Moving to a new city, living apart from close friends, and joining a ministry with an older, confident staff can sometimes be as daunting as it sounds.  A few months ago at Central I was among the oldest on campus, in ministry leadership positions, feeling like I was ready to graduate and take on the whole Empire myself.  Thankfully, I am in the best community to help me transition into the real world of full time ministry.  Still, sometimes I can't help but feel like I'm a kid who's in over his head, light-years away from being the confident leader that I'd hoped I'd instantly become as soon as I began with Ascent. How easy it is to live in the world of comparing myself with others around me and my idealized version of Aaron.

But God has another idea as he revealed during a prayer time in which I saw myself immersed in trench warfare covering the back of another soldier.  If I'm sulking in an attitude of I have nothing to offer, it won't just affect me, but those around me who I'm meant to support!

When I, or you, are struggling, may we not give in to self pity worrying about what we're not, but turn to God to hear him tell us who we ARE.  There are souls under attack, waiting for sons and daughters of the King to take their place in bringing Jesus' kingdom of love to a hurting world. Jesus says the kingdom of God is here! Being in relationship with God isn't just about going to heaven when we die, but living empowered by his Spirit, bringing heaven to earth every day, in every part of our lives!


He is with us! And we are in this together.

War post 1: Sin as disease

It's a heavy subject for my first series of blog posts, but lately I've been immersed in portrayals of war. Besides the reality of the inner city where drug and gang related shootings are common, I visited one of the largest WWI museums in the world here in K.C., we've been watching the series Band of Brothers which chronicles the experience of a company of paratroopers in WWII, and I'm reading a biography of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a German pastor who spiritually and practically led a resistance movement to Hitler's Nazi regime and was eventually killed in a concentration camp.

In trying to grasp the reality and depravity of war, it's impossible not to ask the question of God, "Where were you?"  One insight from Bonhoeffer that has meant a lot to me is how he describes war like time-lapse photography, which highlights movements which otherwise might've gone unnoticed. "War makes manifest in a particularly drastic and unshrouded form that which for years has become ever more dreadfully clear to us as the essence of the 'world.'"  Injustice, abuse, violence and death all exist before and outside of war, but when they occur in such a concentrated and horrendous way, we can no longer pretend they don't exist and that we and the world are getting along just fine.

A Christian concept of sin is that of a disease which is present in all of us. Though I haven't committed a wartime atrocity, I see the very same self-serving tendency to satisfy my desires (even if it's to cover up my fear or pain) at the expense of others play out in my everyday life. The good news is that Jesus says “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners and need to repent.”  Only when I acknowledge my sickness, can I hear the call of the One who truly heals. And instead of beating myself up when sin surfaces in my life, I can confess it immediately to God, stand in Christ's complete forgiveness, and be surprised that in my diseased condition, it's only by God's mercy that I don't sin more than I actually do.


C.S. Lewis describes the Holy Spirit as a "good infection" which over time spreads in us to heal the ways our identity, mind, and ability to relate to others are affected by the disease of sin. Rather than just treating symptoms of the disease by trying to make ourselves stop doing specific sinful actions, we can spend time with God asking him to do healing work in those deeper parts of us that He brings up, which is usually one area at a time.  This process continues until we are no longer in these diseased bodies, and are made new and perfect with Him.


The next time you hear of wars and abuses, may you be reminded of our spiritually diseased condition, and remember the promise of healing from a God who loves us.

Day of birth, and birth of a blog

Hello all!

I thought it was fitting to launch this blog on my birthday to mark a year of new beginnings. This is my first post-school birthday, my first full time job, but not, however, my first blog: long ago I had a Xanga online journal/diary which dealt with the oft-tumultuous joys and concerns of being 16..

A snapshot of life now: I'm working full-time in Kansas City with Ascent Ministries: a discipleship organization where I receive teaching in the Bible, leadership, prayer, and other aspects of ministry, while serving the poor and building relationships with internationals in the city. We travel to Pella, Iowa where I meet with students from Central College (from where I graduated) to walk with them in their faith, and I am involved with leading worship for Ascent happenings here and there.

The title Traveler's Song came from feelings of change as I enter my post-college future that has seemed so far off for so long.  The phrase "when I grow up..." is being filled in, and I'm seeing life more as a journey with my Author where the end isn't success, prosperity and safety, but more of Him here, whatever and wherever that looks like, until I'm united with Him there.

Thrice - In Exile

I am in exile, a sojourner
A citizen of some other place

All I've seen is just a glimmer in a shadowy mirror
But I know, one day well see face to face

  

My heart is filled with songs of forever
A city that endures when all is made new
I know I don't belong here, I'll never
Call this place my home, I'm just passing through